Today was the first day I let myself openly admit that I must return to NYC. It was just to myself, not outloud. Some may say that they could have told me that before I left, but I genuinely tried to give Texas a chance. And I will remain as open-minded as possible. It is a great town and I understand why people like it so much here. But NYC is where I belong. Now to convince my boyfriend and figure out how I can plan the rest of my life around this.
This won't happen for a a year or two, or maybe never if I end up changing my mind. But I've finally let myself openly admit that I've made my decision and that's a big step in itself. (And of course sharing it on here is an even bigger leap.)
And somehow it frees me to enjoy my time here even more. I don't regret my decision to move here because I would never have had the wonderful experiences I have had here, or my new job. And I moved here to determine if I think I could be happy here longterm. And that's exactly what I discovered. Unfortunately, the answer is that I don't think it is for me, but like so many other things in life, I would have never known if I didn't try.
I imagine that if we do return out east, in another year or two we would find jobs in NYC and buy a house in New Jersey... But we'll see. I mean, who knew a year ago that I'd now be living in Texas? So who knows where I'll be two years from now...
But a girl can dream. :-)
