Defying Gravity

This past week has been wonderful.

I knocked off the last and most important thing on my "To Do Before Leaving NYC" list and saw Wicked, so powerfully beautiful, even from my seat in the next to last row.

After 5-1/2 years at my job, they threw me a goodbye party and before I knew it, it was my last day. I've learned so much there but I knew it was time for me to move on and that I will keep in touch with the wonderful people I have met there.

Friday, after my last (half) day at work, I hurried home to meet the movers. Luckily, my friend Khal had let them in. They had found a parking spot but unfortunately had to tow someone that had illegally parked in one of our blocked-off spots. I was so glad they made it and got my things. And I have to admit, it was very special to me that they are the official movers of the Steelers, Penguins and Pirates since I am rooted in Pittsburgh. Unfortunately, there was some drama though. The one mover gave me some attitude about him forgetting to pack some things. And then a mover called the management company on us, claiming that the movers were scuffing the newly-painted walls in the hall. First of all, there was not any marks when I went out there to check. And second of all, who does that?? The reason this is at all relevant is now the management is asking what we're moving and I'm getting very nervous they're going to figure out that we're subletting the apartment. Which could get us evicted. Granted, I do not live there anymore, but my roommate does and I would never want that to happen to her!! So scared about that and saddened all my stuff is gone.

After my things were all packed up and shipped off, it was time to get ready for my going away party that one of the closest people to me in the world, Lindsay, was throwing. I did not feel up to a party. I was in a horrible mood from the movers and thinking about leaving. And then, I got a call. Apparently there was a huge storm on the way and people were starting to cancel. At that point, I really didn't even want to leave my apartment. I understood that some people couldn't make it, I probably wouldn't be able to go either if I lived far, but the weather just seemed to match what I was feeling and the thought that no one would be able to show up seemed like the last straw. All I could worry about was if my brother was going to make it. I could not imagine being able to leave the city without getting to at least say goodbye to him.

Nervous, I willed myself off the couch from where I had let the time fly by as I stared blankly at the apartment that was now stripped of my things, and forced myself to get ready. I am so glad that I did. So many of my friends made the journey to see me, some from far away. And there were some really wonderful surprises. Lindsay had put together a journal where everyone wrote goodbye notes to me. She had made a wonderful dessert for the occasion. Several other friends brought awesome decorations, wrote touching cards and gave me Godiva chocolates, (I found it really funny that all my friends' gifts were Godiva chocolates, they know me well.) It was a wonderful night and my brother made it. He even had a card for me which he had drawn a lovely goodbye comic inside. When he left and we said goodbye was the first and only time I teared up that evening.

It was a great night with some of my favorite people. I went home and stayed up reading all the messages people had written. They were so sweet and some were very funny. I fell asleep on my couch (the movers had taken my bedding) feeling very ready for the the next day. At some point along the week, I had discovered that what I was feeling was that my life was going to come to an end when I moved to Dallas. I was searching for closure, to be at peace with how I left things in NYC. And I had found that. I also discovered that my life in fact was coming to an end, but only that chapter of my life. A new chapter was just beginning.


The journal Lindsay had made me.







The adorable comic my brother had drawn in his card to me.













I woke up the next morning and could see the sun shining through the windows, the storm was over and it looked like a beautiful day outside. I felt great. And then I started thinking more about my fears of getting evicted and felt very worried. I met Lindsay for breakfast and some errands and wished my roommate Kix goodbye. They walked me out as the car came to take me to the airport.

It was finally time to, (as the Wicked song says,) defy gravity. And move to Dallas.